These two chicks literally wrote the book on flexting. Though they call it "Flirtexting." Either way. They're hot. I'm hoping they'll dance in the music video for my new hit single: I Wanna Sext You Up.

It’s been almost a decade since I’ve serially dated and boy is it good to be back.

And I’m really liking this abbreviated form of dating we’ve developed that involves “flexting”(flirting+texting).

Apparently, the new procedure for hooking it up goes something like this:

1)Ask for phone number.

2)Start flexting.

3)Ask out on date.

4)Go on date.

5)Get laid.

Seriously. And step number 2 is the most crucial step in there. Basically, any good flexter will get laid after one or two dates.

If you can make a woman laugh and get her slightly turned on with some essential flexting innurendo, you can just coast on the date. Which, if you’re like me, is essential because I’m a shitty dater.

Plus, flexting’s got the added bonus of reducing the number of crappy dates you actually have to go on. If the flexting isn’t going so well, you can just drop it.

Oh and if you friend them on FB before the date, then you can basically find out everything about them.

So you go on the date and you’re like: “Huh. She smells good.”

And she’s like: “Huh. He smells good.”

Next thing you know, dem buttons is poppin’.

I like this sooo much. The Brave New World is here and it’s hot.

Soma me, baby!

You have nothing at stake here. Why not insult me?

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